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stories by sorashowfan13




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June 28, 2010
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Funny Thoughts, Unknown Things, and All Out Stupid Comments To Ponder

1. Why doesn't McDonald's sell hotdogs?
2. At a movie theater which arm rest is yours?
3. What is Satan's last name?
4. Why do doctors leave the room when you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
5. Where does the toetag go on a dead person if they don't have toes?
6. If your driving a federal owned car, and you run a stop sign, is it considered a felony?
7. Why is there a disclaimer on the Allstate Auto Insurance commericals that says "Not available in all states"?
8. If you dug a hole through the center of the earth,and jumped in, would you stay at the center because of gravity?
9. If a person dies and then springs back to life, do they get their money back for the coffin?
10. If you are asked to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth and your the main witness, what if you say "no"?
11. Do they bury people with their braces on?
12. How far east can you go before you're heading west?
13. How does a Real Estate company sell its office without causing confusion?
14. Do dentists go to other dentists or do they just do it themselves?
15. If, in a baseball game, the batter hits a ball splitting it right down the center with half the ball flying out of the park and the other half being caught, what is the final ruling?
16. Why do people think that swaying their arm back and forth would change the direction of a bowling ball?
17. Why is it that everyone driving faster than you is considered an idiot and everyone driving slower than you is a moron?
18. If pro and con are opposites, wouldn't the opposite of progress be congress?
19. Why does grape flavor smell the way it is when actual grapes don't taste or smell anything like it.
20. If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
21. Is it rude for a deaf person to talk (sign) with their mouth full of food?
22. If its 11:30 PM Dec 31 in Texas and 12:30 AM Jan 1st in New York and you have a New York driver's license that expires Jan 2007, does that mean your license has expired?
23. What's the difference between normal ketchup and fancy ketchup?
24. Why is the Lone Ranger called 'Lone' if he always has his Indian friend Tonto with him?
25. When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?
26. Are eyebrows considered facial hair?
27. In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"?
28. Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions?
29. Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
30. Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary?
31. Can you daydream at night?
32. Why is it that on a phone or calculator, the number five has a little dot on it?
33. Can crop circles be square?
34. If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor?
35. Is it legal to travel down a road in reverse, as long as your following the direction of the traffic?
36. Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?
37. What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?
38. If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?
39. How can something be "new" and "improved"? if it's new, what was it improving on?
40. Why aren't drapes double sided so it looks nice on the inside and outside of your home?
41. Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"?
42. If laughter is the best medicine, who's the idiot who said they 'died laughing'?
43. If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
44. Why are the little styrofoam pieces called peanuts?
45. Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.
46. Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts?
47. Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing?
48. If a bald person works as a chef at a restaurant, do they have to wear a hairnet?
49. If milk goes bad if not refrigerated, does it go bad if the cow isnt refrigerated?
50. Do prison buses have emergency exits?
51. Do astronauts change their clocks when they move over different time zones in space?
52. When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?
53. If a guy that was about to die in the electric chair had a heart attack should they save him?
54. Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
55. If London Bridge is still standing, why is there a song about it falling down?
56. Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull a baby to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle on the ground?
57. If parents say, "Never take candy from strangers" then why do we celebrate Halloween?
58. Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself?
58. Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
59. If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
60. Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning?
61. Why is it called a funny bone, when if you hit it, it's not funny at all?
62. Do you yawn in your sleep?
63. Do glow-in-the-dark objects stop glowing when somebody turns the lights on?
64. If you died with braces on, would they take them off?
65. How come lemon washing up liquid contains real lemons, but lemon juice contains artificial flavorings.
66. Do you wake up or open your eyes first?
67. Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them?
68. Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?
69. How do you handcuff a one-armed man?
70. If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?
71. In some books, why do they have blank pages at the very end?
72. Why can't donuts be square?
73. What happens to an irrisitable force when it hits an immovable object?
74. If there's a speed of sound and a speed of light, is there a speed of smell?
75. Do people in prison celebrate halloween.... if so how?
76. Do the security guards at airports have to go through airport security when they get to work?
78. Why are all of the Harry Potter spells in Latin if they're English?
79. Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
80. What would happen to the sea's water level if every boat in the World was taken out of the water at the same time?
81. Do the English people eat English muffins, or are they just called muffins?
82. How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?
83. Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
84. Why does Jello have a smell when you add the powder in the water, but when it "gels" the smell is gone?
85. Why are dogs noses always wet?
86. Why do people say "heads up" when you should duck?
87. Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread?
88. If one man says, "it was an uphill battle," and another says, "it went downhill from there," how could they both be having troubles?
89. Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
90. Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
91. When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
92. Why does someone believe you when you say "there are more than four billion stars", but check when you say the paint is wet?
93. Can you cry under water?
94. If you blew a bubble in space, would it ever pop?
95. Why do they put holes in crackers?
96. What do people in China call their good plates?
97. Why do they call him Donkey Kong if he is not a donkey?
98. Do stuttering people stutter when they're thinking to themselves?
99. If you put a chameleon in a room full of mirrors, what color would it turn?
100. Why do we press the start button to turn off the computer?
100 Funny Thoughs, Unknown Things, and All Out Stupid Comments To Ponder...

See if you can solve any of these.. this is my challange to you.
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:iconfrostdragon32:
frostdragon32 Featured By Owner Jul 13, 2013
Ummmmmmmmmmmmmm............................no idea.
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:iconpipe-stream:
Pipe-stream Featured By Owner Dec 18, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
#61: it's called the 'humerus' bone which sounds like 'humorous'. Also there's a nerve at the end of the bone, and when you hit it, in can cause a tingly sensation (a weird or 'funny' feeling).
#99 is interesting..
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:icontwilighters01:
twilighters01 Featured By Owner May 31, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
i can answer 32 its for people who are blind the will know what numbers to type in by feeling that dot, u also can daydream at night becuase if you not asleep you still daydeaming, its just called that cause most people day dream during the day and dream during the night unless your an insomniac
42 cracked me up.
on 86 someone once in pe said head's up and so i did and the ball hit me in the back of the head
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:iconb18j:
b18j Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2011  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
I know the answer to #27!
the macaroni was a popular hair style in england, the song was written during the american revolution to mock the colonists, saying that he thought he was sooo fancy when he put a feather in his hat
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:iconpinki-doodle:
Pinki-Doodle Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2010
I am seriously baffled, which arm rest is yours???? And why cant donuts be square!
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